Erotic fiction is a bit like Marmite. Either loved or scoffed at, the world has an opinion and more often than not it’s derisory. But I think that many are missing the point.

Thank goodness for Bridgerton and the proof that we love a bit of raunch! And didn’t watching it make us crave for a bit of the action ourselves?

But how?

As a woman sometimes sex is the last thing we think we want.  After a day exhausted from the demands of family, or battling public transport after a tough day at work. Having to get naked and intimate with a loved one can be low on the wish list.  Many of us have been there. On top of that, as we get older, gone are the old seduction mechanisms; hot dates, meals out, meaningful eye contact over a glass of wine. Where focus is solely on each other and not hampered by a demanding child, bone deep exhaustion or even the boredom of same company day in day out, thanks to Covid.

Reading erotic love stories (aka Cliterature) is a good way to switch off from the daily demands  and just feel. For our bodies to react physically from the words of a book alone. There are many worries in life to be bogged down with, so many issues in the world that have the power to sadden, frighted, worry or infuriate us.  Withdrawing from all of that for a few minutes in the day or week, to enjoy a delicious escapism, indulging in an adult ideal. One which, however unbelievable, has the power to transports us and make our bodies react viscerally has got to be a benefit to our mental health too.

It shouldn’t be shameful to broaden our reading habits beyond what looks impressive on the train or at a book club.  The thought of racing through some pacey prose is easy to ‘sniff at’ for the more discerning reader, however repeat the formula of the book, toe curling or cheesy the idea may be. If the writing has the power to make you swoon a little, your cheeks flush and heart race then it is also an excellent way to trigger neurotransmitters, namely nerves, hormones and other chemicals the brain broadcasts, to start the cascade of reactions which lead to arousal.

Arousal leads to sex…

A conundrum that is as old as the human race, in the context of a heterosexual relationship, men need sex to experience intimacy but women need intimacy to have sex.

Sex is good for us, we get told this by doctors and health advisers.

But how?

Here’s the theory bit…Science tells us sex gives us a massive endorphins release (more than exercise or the gym). Which in turn, by activating natural ‘killer cells’ (cells which kill defective cells including cancer), boosts the immune system like nothing else. Endorphins, according to neuroscientists, serve as the body’s natural reward system. They reverse the body’s ageing processes by keeping brain cells young and healthy. Helping us to think creatively, have more endurance and maintain a harmonious relationship with those around us.  They are great for skin tone because skin cells have endorphin receptors which are beneficial and can make you look younger. Whilst endorphins are known for their ability to reduce physical pain, sometimes as effective as a dose of morphine, they play a key role in preventing anxiety and depression too.

Sounds easy, most men just need a women to turn them on, but sometimes women need a bit more. The path to a perfect later sex life is fantasy, it is the answer to so many things.  For us, being in the mood has a lot to do with whether we feel like having sex. Unlike men who just thinking about sex can lead to erection, arousal for women requires more factors in play. Feeling ‘horny’ is much more of a mind-body reaction and sometimes needs more than just a passing thought or brush of a hand.  If we feel unloved or unappreciated or have been fighting with our partner even more so.

So how do we bridge that gap which widens with each passing year? 

So much goes on in a woman’s head. Our brains being our most important sexual organ. We are a thoughtful gender. Kickstarting sexual desire with a little help from a perfect, fictional alpha-male has got to be a good thing.  Women don’t need to tell their partner everything that is going on in their head, we need to keep some things to ourselves.  “Women have secrets.” I remember my Grandmother saying, has stuck with me and now I understand her wise words.

Getting immersed in fictional foreplay, the thrill of a chase, hate to love, expert hands knowing just the right sweet spots from a twinkly-eyed devil.  Women need the fantasy of a perfect specimen.  For our minds to be seduced by imagining the contoured torso, sculpted forearms, and a dimpled induced megawatt smile, to name a few, could be the best way to get our thighs clenching and our thoughts on track for a steamy night between the sheets. If sex is as good for our health as research indicates, then powering up your kindle or turning a page is a great first step in helping our bodies to follow suit.  It doesn’t have be to be all about sex though.  We may just want to feel romantic, it will be a while to wait for the next Bridgerton so in the meantime escaping with a good dose of cliterature could be the next best thing.

Emma Perle

Author

Much Ado About Benedict

https://pegasuspublishers.com/books/all/much-ado-about-benedict